Clarion Content

This piece was submitted by someone very close to the Clarion Content's editorial board. And you know how, dear readers, in our efforts to emulate dear old Uncle Ben we like some practical advice here at the Clarion Content.

The key to making good time driving from Durham to Chapel Hill on the 15-501 is put the hammer down, pedal to the metal. An old friend told me the deal a long ago time. How long ago you ask; so long ago that Darryl's was still open at 15-501 and Garrett Road, so long ago that there was isn't even a hint of Kroger's in Witherspoon Rose Culture's backyard, let alone the tower now out in front of it...

My buddy had a small, old, blue truck with a manual transmission. Some joker from the North Carolina Department of Transportation must of thought it a real funny to pace the lights from Durham to Chapel Hill so that if catch but one you have to slam on it to get back on pace. My buddy, he would pounce on it the little truck, leaping out of the blocks, up through the gears, taking off, shooting out of the area where the long since demolished Southsquare Mall used to be.

And, oh, it is possible to make every light, from the ugly "Blue Skyscraper," where 15-501 Business and 15-501 proper merge, rejoining to make the Jefferson Davis Highway run to Chapel Hill, at which point, Franklin Street cuts off to make the trek up the hill that gives the town the latter half of its name.

How many lights is that in all? Can't say I have ever counted, I have only driven it half a million times since then. What makes you think that even once in all those trips I was any less than Lomaned out, drifting over the scape unable to do anything as linear as count. However many lights there are, rest assured, the only way to make'em is to floor it. And if you get caught at any one of them, the only way you are making the next one is to really push it to the floor. It can be done. I have seen it done. In crappy cars, with terrible acceleration. But of course, the speed limit on 15-501 is only 45 miles-an-hour! MF-ing prankster at NCDOT, because you have to go at least 60mph, out of the chute, to make all the lights. If you get caught at one, say like at I-40, even at 5.30am on Sunday, unless you hit it, accelerating as fast as you can to on the plus side 60mph, you are bound to catch the next light, too.

You must come out of the blocks fast. Whether you are coming from Durham or Chapel Hill. Punch it. Make that first light. Slam on it further from there. If necessary, slide right. That third lane goes almost all the way through now. The right lane is the new fast lane these days anyway. No one will mind. You can make tracks.

Labels: Practical Advice